What is being 25 supposed to feel like ?
When i was younger , i thought that  a woman of that age  would be so knowledgeable and mature , so settled in life with a good career and maybe a husband and children.
Bang, i finally got there -25 years old . i am begin to embark on the road which is going down both metally and physically.
i am still as clueless as i had felt when i was  18  ,only got more gray hairs and crow's - feet around my eyes.

I feel sad, that
.......I am alone.
.......I am a lit busy with a job which i hate so much
.......I have no friend beside me.(by friends which i mean girls, i do have boys here )
.......I got fats.

Why am I not happy with what I have?
I couldn't becuase there are too many incidents going on in my life and it never stops.
Every time i tried my best to bulid up the strength to be positive , but the damn reality just ruined it so easily. I am getting sick and tired of being strong or facing on everything.

I am pathetic ,cuz i have all kinds of thoughts ,but i have no guts to do it .
Sometimes i wish i could be more like chief ,lil pig and the other girls .
be more independent and positive .
i wanna go abroad , but like chief said , i am such a home-bird ,and i am kinda afriad of leaving  the life i already have in china.
sigh ~~~

I was rarely online in the past few days . I am becoming more and more weird,i guess.Dont wanna hang out with my friends , well,that's not ture. My friends are all living in other cities now, we can never hang out as often as we did before .Things are changing , so are the ppl.We grow up , have our own life ,get a boyfriend or girlfriend and work the ass off to make our life better.

Last night , on the way to pick up my lil brother , the moment i saw his school reminded me of my amazing high school life with all the friends .See, i use amazing now , i'd never thought of using the word before when i was a student. But ,everything is quite different . I am not a student anymore .Then all of the sudden, i so eagerly wanna be a student again .So, the turth is enjoy your school life when you still have it ,u'd be regretful otherwise.

Fewer and fewer ppl are stick to write entries here , a lot of them are heading to MSN SPACE or MY SPACE .Never Mind .I will keep writing here .It's ok if no one reads my entries , cuz i just wanna vet my feelings here .I dont even want my friends to know . Only liu dong kinda know me here .That's good.